The Secret To Making People Feel Great
I know of a young man coming from a middle class family - tall, lanky, very ordinary looking, and can easily blend in a crowd. The first time I met him up close, I immediately noticed the young man’s eyes. I was drawn into the sparkle of his eyes.
Wait till he opens his mouth and speak. Other teenagers are drawn to him, crowd around him, and listen to each and every word he says. People from all walks of life immediately feel at ease in his company. Older relatives, friends more senior his age, and associates of his parents enjoy conversing with him, for he has an inquisitive and curious mind. They listen to this lanky teenager as he speaks his mind. His friends flock around him. He is everybody’s best friend.
Whenever I am around this young person, I know I am in the presence of a very powerful force, a living proof of a compelling personality, and an actual personification of a charismatic person!
Now, what is the secret of this young person? Why do people flock around him?
The charismatic young teenager draws people near, for he makes them feel great about themselves. He has the capacity to make them feel at ease and comfortable. More importantly, he makes other people experience total acceptance.
I observed that young person as he grew up. Little by little, I was able to discover his secrets for having a charismatic personality. Take a look at his traits:
At an early age, he has a genuine love for life. He accepts life as it is — as an exciting journey, with every twists and turns as opportunities to savor the adventure. He imagines himself like a virus that infects other people to have fun in this incredible journey.
This genuine love for life is very much evident in his enthusiastic and vibrant personality. He can never be described as reserved. He breathes enthusiasm in all his actions. His fast-paced walk, colorful word expressions, and active hand gestures convey excitement. All of these communicate one message: “I love life!”
His larger than life persona spills over his genuine interest in people. He is forever curious about other people’s ideas, concerns, perceptions, feelings, and experiences.
Whenever he meets people, he takes conscious effort to encourage them to talk about themselves and their passions in life. He always steers the conversation towards the person and never about himself. He has big ears for his friends’ dreams and aspirations.
This simple act of listening makes people feel at ease and accepted in his presence. In a conversation, he listens intently, nods, and looks at the person straight into his eyes. He validates the opinions and ideas of his friends. Emphatic listening makes him engaging to people.
Amidst all the admiration from people, the young lad keeps his feet on the ground exuding humility. This last trait endears the young man to his friends and acquaintances. His humility makes him approachable, accessible, and likeable. More importantly, the same trait earned him their respect.
Add up all these three traits and you’ve got charisma. For the young man in the story, charisma is never exclusively about himself. On the contrary, charisma is all about making people feel great and at ease about themselves!
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